Over 40 mama — Adventures in poop, patience, and first-time parenthood

A new approach to sleep
February 26, 2009, 5:41 am
Filed under: sleep

It could be that she’s teething  – or simply that she’s 10 months old and totally ON FIRE about being alive and getting into everything…now! Either way, we’re trying new and inventive ways to encourage Ms Frijolita to sleep through the night.  Two nights ago, she woke 5 – count ’em, 5 – times.  Each time, I went over and held her…didn’t pick her up….just held her and sang to her and massaged her body.  Each time, I stayed with her til she was asleep or almost asleep.  It usually took between 3 and 15 min, but I could feel the difference in her little body – how much more relaxed she was.  Hoping to teach her what it feels like to be soothed, without having to nurse.  

Last night, she woke once, at 4.  I soothed her for a while and nursed b/c she’s usually hungry at this hour.  Probably should have given her the bottle instead, but was too tired to think of that in the moment. Will try that tomorrow.


February 20, 2009, 7:39 pm
Filed under: miracle, recommendations

Who knew leaving the house could be so awesome! OMG KT and I saw Z-Trip last night and it positively RULED! He played at 1015 Folsom, which has been remodeled since I was last there a hundred or so years ago, and it felt like a completely different place.  Of course, we were not in the door 20 seconds before I ran into an old clubbing friend from my mis-spent dancing youth.  

The crowd was really cool – nobody had attitude – everyone was just having a good time.  I felt like the old cougar lady shakin it up with the kiddos.  But the kids were so down-to-earth and friendly and accepting.  The cougar thing was my trip – not theirs. 

Good Lordy, it felt good to really dance.  Z-Trip’s music is really pretty intense.  He’s got this insane amalgamation of samples from the last 40 years of musical history, and matches keys, timbres, even lyrics to come up with some very playful and ROCKIN results.  There was some nice electro going on in the front room, too. Oh man, must….leave…house…more…often…

everyone’s sick
February 18, 2009, 9:25 pm
Filed under: community

Okay, friends, romans and countrymen – everyone in our wee family is sick.  Papa got sick this AM, bug is sick now, and mama is about to get sick if she doesn’t get sleep soon.  

Drop by at your own risk. 

love, your friends, the festering germ farmers

Boy do I hate “cry it out.”
February 17, 2009, 2:24 pm
Filed under: guilt, insanity, notes to self, sleep

Valentine’s Day Brunch
February 15, 2009, 9:36 pm
Filed under: community, milestones, miracle

We spent this rainy day with a bunch of other parents and their kids.  I love seeing all the wee ones as they bibble around and screech and throw things and stack blocks and dance.  

I’ve had numerous conversations with K, who hosted the brunch, about the myriad ways in which our families and those of our friends could collaborate on something larger than us. What does that look like – the extended family? A co-op?  Some other way to take advantage of economies of scale with 10-20-50 families? I have fantasies of starting a school.  But then I go to the East Bay Preschool Fair and find a gazillion really awesome little schools.   And I’m not sure I’m down with starting a middle or high school.  

The bug is suddenly more and more “online.” Today, she and KT played peek-a-boo, and it wasn’t just KT hiding her face.  The bug too hid her face, only to show it again, beaming!! She learned how to slide down a (gradual) stair without bonking her head.  It’s taken a few days for her to get back to this after a bit of a bonk last week. And, at the table, she not only holds the drinking glass by herself, she lets out a screech when she’s ready for us to hand it to her.   

I had a chat with one of the papas at todays brunch about the way that babies transition from protoplasmic blob to conscious being.  I know it’s happening now. But why?  This papa has studied a bunch of developmental psych says that the psych community talks about babies first s consciousness as his or her “image.”  The image of self, in relation to their environment, parents, etc.   I’m not sure the word “image” worked for me in this context, as I think of babies as more experiential. Maybe “map” would make more sense.  Certainly the idea that a baby’s soul/brain/consciousness is a map …. or template on which their early experiences are imprinted makes sense.  But where? Why? What’s there before all this other crap gets imprinted?  I need to find a good book that explains it all.  

In addition to bug-mania, I have a million projects going on these days:  The killer iPhone app, for one.  A screenplay.  My growing social media consulting practice and a cool and fairly intense client.  A kids’ educational event I’m producing. Learning to sew, which is totally rewarding!  Cooking a lot, too.  Something about this crap weather and even crappier economy makes me want to prepare large cauldrons of stewed meat.

The sweetest day
February 12, 2009, 9:03 pm
Filed under: milestones, notes to self

I do believe there is a day which will go down in memory as the bug’s sweetest day.  

For weeks now, she’s been  getting wiser…learning to stand, crawl over things, assess distance, match two objects with similar shapes, nest one item into another that is larger. She loves music, and cackles with glee when she sees the ASL sign for a word she knows. She is quickly becoming a curious, amazing person in and of herself.  

Somewhere in here – any day now – we will enter into the realm of toddlerhood, and will deal with all the annoyances and frustrations of a being who wants nothing more than to explode into herself. This will be met with some combination of C’s and my tolerance for the aforementioned explosion, and our sometimes-vast differences in parenting styles and philosophies.

I’m sure it will be fine. Ultimately.  But man, I want to put this phase in a bottle and keep it in the attic for later.

February 7, 2009, 7:48 am
Filed under: insanity, milestones

Thanks to some great sleuth work by mama pajama, we’re pretty sure mz bean is teething.  That would explain the tenfold increase in stratospheric screaming, her inability to get to sleep, AND *ta-da* the glistening poo-poos.  Somewhere, ages ago, I remember reading that the copious amounts of saliva generated whilst teething can really change the viscosity of poo-poo.  Isn’t that awesome? Well, not for the kid, really. But it’s awesome that someone figured that out.

‘Course her sleep schedule – the precious couple o’ weeks of 8 continuous hours – is now kaput.