Over 40 mama — Adventures in poop, patience, and first-time parenthood


C’s first Father’s Day
June 16, 2008, 1:49 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I had elaborate plans for a day of fun surprises for Father’s Day.  And the bean had her own ideas about what would be surprising!

To make matters more interesting, C and his parents never celebrated Father’s or Mother’s Day, citing the Hallmark-ish commercialism of it all. To that, I say, posh!  You don’t have to buy anything to have a blast and celebrate mama and papa.

So yesterday, after the bean woke us up way too early and decided to eat rather than let me make C a surprise breakfast in bed,  I ended up blindfolding C to take him to one of our favorite breakfast places. The bean was crying her head off, so he sat in the back seat to comfort her. When we got there, people were like “Is that a hostage in the back seat? What is he doing to that baby???”

Because it was so late, the hungover hipster crowd had replaced the fun early AM  parent crowd and the line was around the block!

So C, having figured out where we were by this point, suggested another restaurant. Which did indeed have much less of a line. So much for that surprise.

Then he had a surprise visit from some friends L and D who showed up with their little boy.  In the surprise department, this was a bit of a cluster foo because I had scheduled this meeting with L before I remembered that it was Father’sDay.  L has a DJ gig coming up, and asked me if she could use the gear here to get ready.  Sure! I said, forgetting that I had this day of surprises lined up.  Fortunately, it WAS a surprise for  my husband C, and he and D had a great time playing with little T in the garden.

Then it was time for the Steam Train. C has loved this steam train since forever, so we drove to the top of Grizzly Peak where there’s this really cool old steam train that cruises through Tilden Park – gorgeous! And it was full of little muffins and their parents.  Unfortunately, though, it was late and I was starting to get anxious that we would be ungainly late for the last part of our surpise-a-thon, which was barbecue with his parents back at our house.

And of course no engineered day of surprises and fun goes without out its stupid piss-ant fight, and C’s first Father’s Day was no exception.  He criticized my (lack of) scheduling and the requisite anxiety it produced, and I got pissed at his nit-picking and dwelling on the negative, in the midst of all these fun, if not-so-surprising surprises.

We raced back home and his parents were already here – nary a modicum of concern that we were late at all.  I’d marinated some rib eyes, and we grilled outside as the sun sank below the neighbor’s bushes.  The bean basked in grandma and grandpa love as she fell asleep in the bouncy chair that she LOVES.

So, okay, I get that part of the problem with these faux holidays is the expectatoins they set up, and I set up some doozies by planning an entire day of surprises (none of which were really much of a surprise, save the argument). Perhaps this is why so many people choose not to celebrate them.  I dunno, I still have hope.  We’ll see what happens next year.

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